Love Advice & Romance Talk – Free Internet Radio Interviews with Love Masters plus Love Tips, Tools, Techniques and Special Reports
Favorite LOVE Links!


Everlasting Matrimony: Pearls of Wisdom From Couples Married 50 Years or More


by Sheryl P. Kurland


In this new column – “Back-Talk!” – we go to the real-life relationship experts – couples who have been married 50 years or more.  Husband and wife will each give their experienced answer to a relationship problem.





My husband dresses like a total slob on weekends but wears suits and ties during the week for his job.  Come Saturday and Sunday, he puts on the same ugly plaid shorts and raggedy t-shirts.  And he shaves only if we're going out on Saturday night.  It's very unappealing and makes me feel that he doesn't care about our relationship.  His excuse is "I work hard all week and like to relax on weekends.  I'm the same person no matter what I'm wearing."  I don't expect him to be a fashion statement, however, his "condition" is a real turn-off and I can't stand him hugging or touching me.  He says it wouldn't bother him if I was the way he is, which, of course, I would never be.  Am I being too harsh?  Can you shed some light on this controversy?
- Marie


As I grew older, I was amazed at how much attention people paid to appearances, clothes and hygiene.  Married life is not an excuse to relax and ignore these habits.  When you are young and dating, you try to impress your date.  Now is time to check seemingly minor details: clean fingernails, nice breath and pressed clothes are important.  Your spouse should remain your date for the rest of your life.  This will make you look forward to being with your partner in a more exciting way as you grow older together.

I suggest that you buy your husband two sets of very casual outfits for him to wear on weekends and insist that he wear one on Saturday, one on Sunday.  Then launder them for the next weekend's use.  Since he must wear suits and a tie during the week, he should not object too much to these casual outfits for the two days of the weekend.

If he does not cooperate with this plan, I suggest a compromise.  Let him dress like a slob one day of the weekend, and wear one of his new casual outfits the other.  Who knows - he might like it.


Ed & Bea have been married 63 years




Do you have a relationship problem you need help resolving?  Submit questions to Sheryl Kurland, author of Everlasting Matrimony,
at  She’ll have your question answered by a couple married 50-plus years. 
Visit her book web site,

Return to Love Links

(c) 2005-2006 * favorite Love Links